


Sundown

by Saree



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-14
Updated: 2014-03-14
Packaged: 2018-01-15 18:17:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1314496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saree/pseuds/Saree
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And it occurs to you, as you stand there, antagonizing Roxas, that you're not going to get to play hero ever again. (Rikucentric; Days. Regarding Sora and Kairi.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sundown

**Author's Note:**

> _Love is why we do it; love is worth the pain. Love is why we fall down, and get back up again. Love is where the heart lies, love is from above; love is this. This is love._

What hits you hardest isn't the visceral sacrifice you're making, like DiZ and Naminé think. In your eyes, it's not really a sacrifice, anyway. You've been protecting Sora and Kairi since you were pushing over each others blocks on a classroom rug at story-time, disrupting the whole class with your conjoined fairytale land of heroic dragons, warrior princesses, and rugged knights. You've been protecting them forever, even before you were given a fantasy blade to hold by someone from the outside world. 

Maybe Kairi came a few years later, but her bond to you is no less strong, and maybe Sora has a few extra years, but his bond to you is not faded one bit. 

Sacrifice comes easily to you when it concerns your friends. There's nothing you want more than the power to protect them, and protection comes with sacrifice. 

Keeping them happy made you go from playing hero to playing villain, because the day Sora had fashioned his own play sword was the day he said that he wanted to be "a hero like Riku". 

And, well, who were you to disagree? Sure, you put up a fight to keep your head about you, but you eventually agreed to be the villain. 

Tidus and Wakka shook in their sandals as you wickedly laughed, claiming to take over the island, to make every ceremonial statue start to walk and set to eat every child on the islands. There was no way, after that day of play, that they were going to forget it. 

Soon, you was no longer the 'hero', but the 'villain' everyone could defeat. At first, you didn't like it. You almost said it, but tried to bring it to reason for yourself. Obviously, if you were the villain and they had to vanquish you... that meant you were getting stronger, and so were they. 

Another way to keep them safe. So, fine—you'd take it. 

It never occurred to you that you might play the villain again. There's no forgetting the moment you almost _did_ end Sora, for real, no towel-capes and wooden swords. You try to push it out of your mind every now and then, but then, some days, you dwell on it. You remind yourself of your anger and it mingles with deep disappointment and self-hate and you're so, so sure that you'll never do anything like that to the people you're supposed to protect ever again. 

The only problem is, the time is now. It's now, where you have to play the villain again. 

You're not entirely comfortable with it, like you were the first time it happened. 

Sacrifices are what they are; you've grown used to them, but the bitter taste of doing bad things for the sake of your loved ones tends to be one you can't wash out. Just how much of a villain are you, now, in the sake of love? 

It's not even the type of love that most books like to specify as doing sacrifices _for_. There are countless texts on how a brave knight would go on to do horrible things for his love of his country, but that's not the kind that burns in your chest like a stick of dynamite ready to go off. 

Naminé speaks to you frankly; she asks "Do you love him?" one day where you both monitor Sora's condition, her with her sketches and you with blind staring. The thought honestly surprises you; you turn your head to look to her even though there's no chance of her seeing the shock in your eyes. After a few moments, it settles, and you push your lips together lightly. 

"Yes." 

She bows her head when she nods. 

"But not the way you do." 

And her head comes up to look at you when she starts. You don't change your expression as you lay a finger-splayed hand on the frosted glass that contains your best friend inside. 

"It's different." You try to explain, but words fail you. The love of a friend is something that you can never quite put into words; Sora's the one that's always been proficient at doing _that_. It's still _love_ \--deep and red and passionate as it is, but it's just not _romantic_. Your heart beats hard when Kairi or Sora speak to you, but it's not because you want them by your side; it's because they're already there and will continue to be there, even when they're oceans away. 

Sacrificing in the name of this love seems natural. It's something people do when they're in love, you reason with yourself. Why should he not make the same sacrifice, just because he doesn't need to kiss either one of them? 

This is your last few moments before you go, because time is running out, and as much as you don't want to do the task ahead of you--

Sacrifices, right? 

Sometimes you have to play the villain even though you don't want to. 

You learned that early on. 

It hurts, yeah. Of course it does. You don't want to do this, but for the people you love—you'll do pretty much anything. 

And it occurs to you, as you stand there, antagonizing Roxas, that you're not going to get to play hero ever again. 

That's fine by you. Playtime is over.


End file.
